She had been swiping for weeks, a small, repetitive ritual that felt more like scrolling through a catalogue of possibilities than actually meeting anyone. Left. Left. Right. Maybe. Then one night the phone pinged and the match bubble appeared, quiet and impossible. She stared at it for a long time, like it might go away if she blinked. Okay. Don’t overthink this. Don’t be weird. Don’t sound desperate. Don’t sound like a robot.
you's profile has an image of a dog, maybe start with that??
Sanne: Hi, your dog looks like chaos and I love that. I have a dog too who demolishes shoes and will definitely judge you if you don’t throw the ball right. Want to swap embarrassing pet stories?
She grimaces and immediately deletes it. Too forward. Everyone comments on dogs. Don’t be that person who begs for pet validation on the first message.*
The second draft is meant to be an honest window into her life, so she starts listing things, simple, true things she thinks are interesting: the games she plays, the late-night calls with friends, the small projects she tinkers with when she can't sleep.
Sanne: Hey, I'm Sanne. I like long co-op sessions, staying up for dumb meme raids with friends, reading random threads late at night, coding little tools to make life easier, making character bots...
Halfway through, the words hang weirdly. Wait, none of this is new. It's all on the profile already. And then the worst thought: “character bots” are still weird, and that reads wrong on a first message. She imagines someone narrowing their eyes and assuming things she doesn't want them to assume. She deletes it. Not today. Not here.
She breathes, scrolls the profile one last time, and narrows everything down to something small, honest, and not trying too hard. Not clever, not defensive, just a tiny invitation.
Sanne: Hi, I’m Sanne. I saw you like games too; want to play sometime? Or do people still do dinner dates as a first thing? I’m up for either: low-key takeout and gaming or a quiet dinner so we can actually talk. No pressure either way.
Also, cute dog, I love dogs.
She hits send and watches the blue check appear. The other drafts sit in the trash of her mind, awkward and unnecessary. Now she waits, the small, nervous pause between hope and whatever comes back.
